Help, I Can’t Stop Thinking Violent or Blasphemous Thoughts! Does This Mean I’m Lost or That I’ve Committed the Unpardonable Sin?

There is a symptom that many people with mental illness get of unwanted violent or highly sexualized or blasphemous thoughts or images popping into their mind. Mainstream psychiatry calls this Obsessive Compulsive Disorder. OCD also involves outward compulsions such as handwashing due to a fear of germs, or compulsively touching certain places in the house to stop one’s family from dying, an irrational fear that is common with this condition. But not everyone has the kind that involves the outward compulsions. Some people have only the disturbing intrusive thoughts, and inner compulsions, such as saying a prayer asking for forgiveness every time the violent thought comes into their mind. This is unofficially referred to as “Pure O” by therapists (pure obsessions). And it’s possible and very common for a person to have both compulsive thoughts and outer compulsions, and they often have more than one fear through their years of suffering from this condition. For instance, they may start out with a fear their family will die if they don’t touch certain places in the house, and then 5 years later have hand-washing obsessions instead, and the condition often morphs in this way.

As explained in an earlier article entitled ‘What is Schizophrenia’ mainstream psychiatry groups mental illnesses by their symptoms, not medical testing. For instance, they don’t test you for something like low serotonin, and if you’re found to have low serotonin then they give you a diagnosis of OCD. Instead you meet with a psychiatrist and are evaluated based on an interview, or you fill out a written questionnaire and you’re diagnosed with OCD based on the interview or the questionnaire (an interview is the much more common way diagnoses are given).

Due to the definition of an illness, that of being a condition of known pathology, I don’t believe mental illnesses in the DSM 5, the diagnostic book for the field of psychiatry, fit the definition of being distinct illnesses. Rather they are just symptoms people can get, that are often seen together, and it’s more accurate to call each of them syndromes. For instance, a person may be said to have schizophrenia syndrome, or obsessive compulsive syndrome.

So I will refer to these symptoms of unwanted violent, blasphemous, or sexual images or thoughts as ‘obsessive compulsive syndrome’, or ‘obsessive compulsive symptoms’, or just ‘intrusive thoughts’.

While there’s not one biochemical imbalance or pathology that causes obsessive compulsive symptoms, these symptoms have been linked in the medical literature with two well-documented imbalances…low serotonin and high histamine. Low serotonin causing obsessive thoughts and compulsions, is the imbalance that most psychiatrists treat for, and that most therapists know about, and while there is much medical literature about high histamine causing obsessive thoughts and compulsions, high histamine has not really made it’s way into public knowledge yet. Psychiatrists don’t usually treat for it, choosing to give SSRIs as treatment, and it’s not really common knowledge yet that high histamine causes obsessions and compulsions, except among Functional Medicine doctors and natural health communities, where it is becoming more commonly known.

Back when I was being treated for my obsessive thoughts and compulsions, I was put on SSRIs which can make people with mood swings and mania (which I had) worse, and that’s exactly what happened to me. When I complained about my thoughts and compulsions not lessening or going away, doctors wanted to increase my dose of the SSRIs, which made me manic and out-of-control. However, many people do see a reduction in intrusive thoughts with SSRIs. They are usually the people without mania and mood swings.

It wasn’t until I was put on antihistamine medications that I experienced relief from my obsessive and compulsive thoughts (later I switched to antihistamine supplements which are much more healthy for the body). I researched the medical literature and found that it’s well-documented that high histamine is a common cause of obsessions and compulsions, and that antihistamine medications and supplements have shown to be effective at reducing the obsessions and compulsions.

This was certainly the case with me. At one point I was having intrusive graphic images of violence and murder and sexual acts popping up into my head non-stop. This was also during my psychotic break. Nothing stopped the images except medication, and once on the right medication, the thoughts abated without effort on my part.

In the medical literature, and known to people in the natural health communities, it’s been documented that PANDAS in children has been linked to obsessive thoughts and compulsions. PANDAS is an acronym for Pediatric Autoimmune Neuropsychiatric Disorders Associated with Streptococcal Infections. It’s a strep infection that goes to the brain and affects the entire nervous system. Mothers have seen improvement in their kids with obsessive thoughts and compulsions when they treat the underlying strep infection, and some of kids are now completely free of obsessive-compulsive symptoms. Lyme disease has also been linked with obsessive-compulsive symptoms, and so has mold illness.

When there is a systemic infection of any kind, or systemic toxicity from exposure to toxins, and the cells become overloaded, the toxins or infections will get into the blood stream. A person can become septic and die if the body does not fight off the infections and keep them out of the blood stream where they can damage vital organs. So the body has a defense mechanism. That defense mechanism is to rev up a part of the immune system involved in fighting acute infection, and to quickly kill off the infection or neutralize the toxins. To do this the body uses histamine which is an immune modulator and signaler and it’s involved in “zapping” the toxins or infections and killing or neutralizing them.

When histamine is shot out in high amounts, it can bring on psychiatric symptoms in the brain, including obsessive-compulsive symptoms and psychosis (delusions, disjointed thoughts, confusion, auditory and visual hallucinations).

Toxic black mold was the major player in my obsessive-compulsive symptoms, but really any pathogen or toxin can cause a rise in histamine if the infection or toxicity goes systemic and the body needs to neutralize or kill it quickly with histamine as a protective measure.

The Typical Course The Sufferer Takes
When a person begins to really greatly suffer from distressing obsessive thoughts, it’s common that they will go to parents or pastors for help. (It’s common for this condition to begin in adolescence; but some have it as younger children). They will usually say something to the effect of “Help! I keep thinking highly sexual thoughts or very blasphemous thoughts or very violent thoughts, and I need your prayers that God will give me the self-control to stop thinking these things and get the victory over them.”

They may request to be prayed over or anointed. Usually by the time they come to you for help, they have spent months or even years of obsessively trying to stop thinking the thoughts for several hours or more every day. This isn’t the kind of thing that they want to reach out for help with, as they feel guilty and morally polluted for having these thoughts, and they had hoped to get the victory over the thoughts in their own prayer time, but haven’t been able to get control of the thoughts, and so they are coming to you in a state of desperation, often worried they have either backslidden from God or that they have committed the unpardonable sin. It doesn’t make sense to them that they could have such wicked thoughts on a consistent basis, and still be a Christian, as God calls on us in His Word to take every thought captive, and not being able to do that, they often fear or conclude that they are backslidden or have committed the unpardonable sin.

When they bring their request for help to a pastor, parent, or mentor, there are two responses that are common. 1. The parent or mentor may pray over them, and encourage them to keep trying to take their thoughts captive, and that Jesus will give them the eventual victory. It’s common for the person to think that this is a young adolescent dealing with some new sexual thoughts and temptations, that they didn’t have as a kid, and they just need encouragement and to be reminded of Christ’s promises in the Word and His faithfulness and sufficiency to give them self-control in this new area of life – sexuality – that they are awakening to. If violent thoughts are mentioned the parent may attribute these to changes in testosterone levels going up during puberty if it’s a son, or hormonal mood swings if it’s a daughter.

Usually the parent doesn’t know their kid has been praying over the thoughts for hours every day for months or even years, and they misjudge how much investment the kid has already put into overcoming these thoughts.

2. The other common response is for a parent to try to balance out the overly-dramatic response their kid is having to the thoughts, to put their fears in perspective, and push back against the excessive blame the kid is placing on themselves, and the out-of-proportion significance the kid is giving to the thoughts. The parent may say something like “Carl, they are just thoughts, don’t let them dominate your life.” Or “Every kid your age has some crazy thoughts with hormonal changes going on and you’ll grow out of this and come into your own soon.” The parent is going for a balancing effect – and honestly it’s very good for the parent to counteract and call into question the faulty reasoning, and conclusions the kid with the condition is making, – but the parent doesn’t realize their kid isn’t having the normal intrusive thoughts everyone experiences. Their kid has a condition, and is being bombarded much more frequently with distressing thoughts and also heavy and false emotions, like false guilt, and cognitive distortions like attributing blame to themselves for the thoughts. While adolescence is difficult for everyone, some people develop mental conditions in adolescence, and have an experience that is pathological and out of the norm for what is healthy and normal, which requires hey intervention and treatment. For kids with mental conditions, they may not naturally stabilize and become a well-balanced adult and left untreated may develop psychosis, or continue to have distressing intrusive thoughts in their adult life that doesn’t abate unless successfully treated. The kid may be battling through hundreds or thousands of these thoughts every day, depending on how severe their condition is. They may be highly graphic images, or very detailed accounts of murder or blasphemy or sexual acts.

This is the real reason why the kid is so distressed by them. But usually the kid will not put their situation into such words, and will mention “intrusive thoughts” or “immoral thoughts”, but will not mention the graphic nature of the thoughts or the frequency, due to guilt, and also kids just aren’t very articulate in their teens and it takes time to learn how to bring up sensitive topics like this, and so they may lack the skills and experience to articulate their suffering in a way that allows the parent to see how severe it is. I’ve had obsessive-compulsive thoughts since I was very young (as a young kid my intrusive thoughts were mostly a fear of my family dying and fear of death), and as an adolescent they became sexual, violent, and blasphemous in nature – a new turn that commonly happens – and it took me many years to be able to accurately communicate the severity and level of distress of my intrusive thoughts.

If the kid mentions violent thoughts, the adult in their life may think they are referring to the common temptations to be angry or jealous with siblings, to want to break away from the restraint of their parents, and the need to surrender those fallen desires to God so He can implant His holy desires in them.

If the kid mentions sexual thoughts, the parent may think they are just struggling with the common temptations to lust that kids their age go through, and the parent will encourage them to pray for strength and help from God. Not realizing these are intrusive thoughts are pathological, symptoms of a mental condition.

Unknown to the parent or mentor, the adolescent is not struggling with unholy thoughts. The adolescent is experiencing intrusive involuntary “wild ball” brain signals coming from the unconscious parts of the brain that are distressing in nature. The problem lies in the kid’s inability to tell that what he is experiencing is not in fact a thought, and then using the word ‘thought’ to communicate his struggle.

There is a breakdown in communication due to this, and the teenager feels his distress is dismissed and swept under the rug, or that he is a failure and a hopeless rebel, because he’s sought God in prayer for strength as recommended by mentors, and the thoughts are still as frequent and distressing as before the intense prayer sessions he’s engaged in. He thinks it’s likely he is at odds with God or has committed the unpardonable sin, that there must be some rebellious part of himself that insists on rejecting God, because he can’t seem to get the victory over the thoughts no matter how hard he tries and how committed he is.

When your typical person without obsessive compulsive syndrome has an intrusive thought, the intrusive thought looks like a “wild ball” to them. In sports a wild ball is when the ball slips from the hands of the person throwing it, and instead of going in the intended direction it misses it’s target by a “mile”, and goes in a completely random direction. It’s so erratic it’s often humorous, and when it happens, everyone knew the player didn’t mean to throw it like that and that the ball slipped.

People without obsessive compulsive syndrome can easily tell the intrusive thought is a “wild ball” thought that is a mental glitch taking place. Everything about the thought, the exaggerated content, the way it forms, how it enters the mind – everything about the nature of the thought – just looks like a complete outlier to them. The same way a series of erratic heart palpitations feel and look like a glitch from the normal steady heart pattern, they can see right away these thoughts are different.

This awareness is why they don’t give the thought significance or take blame for the thought.

But those with obsessive compulsive syndrome have compromised mental processing in the area of something self-referential processing. This causes them to lose that awareness that the intrusive thought is a “wild ball thought” coming from an unconscious part of their mind – a different part of their mind than thoughts they choose to think come from – and they see it as no different in nature from our normal thoughts. They lack this perception the way someone with autism might lack the ability to read emotions from looking at someone’s facial expression. They have a very real deficit in this area, and can’t see the thought is coming erratically from left field, and that it’s clearly an involuntary glitch.

Self-referential processing errors also occur in conditions like schizophrenia where the person may lose the ability to tell that their thoughts are coming from their own brain, and may believe a parent or a demon is inserting thoughts into their brain. This is a common symptom of psychosis called thought insertion.

Another common error in self-referential processing is when a person in psychosis believes people can see inside their mind and read their thoughts. They lose the ability to tell their thoughts are private and known by them alone and that another person’s consciousness isn’t involved in reading what goes on in their head.

These two examples are more extreme than what is seen in obsessive compulsive syndrome, but I listed them to give an idea of what self-referential processing is, and how errors in it can cause guilt or fear based on an altered sense of one’s self and their agency over their self and thoughts.

So, because the person with intrusive thoughts loses that awareness that the intrusive thought isn’t coming from their conscious brain, they group the intrusive thought in with their consciously chosen thoughts, desires, and motives, and blame themselves for the thought and identify with it as their own, rather than the brain glitch that it is.

Education can help! Once the person comes to realize they’ve lost accurate perception when it comes to self-referential processing, they’ve lost the perception that the thought is coming out of the blue from the unconscious, involuntary parts of the brain, that the thought is a wild thought, just knowing this truth, will help them recognize what is actually going on, and a brand new pathway in the brain will form, that they then have the option of strengthening by repetition. It’s when we don’t know something that we can’t train our brain to see around the deficit, because we don’t even know there’s a deficit, but once we know the truth, we can then begin working that new pathway, and coming more and more out of the false perception that all our thoughts are the same and they are all chosen, and begin to identify the “wild ball” thoughts more clearly.

Then they won’t experience as much guilt, when this fact can be clearly seen.

The human brain is neuroplastic, meaning we can form new brain pathways, and train our brain to learn new skills and perceptions in areas where there has been a deficit.

Of course, false guilt isn’t the only concern here; it’s also important they get help at the biochemical level to balance their brain and reduce inflammation, and I will talk more about that at the end of the article.

As far as what is going on in the brain of someone with this condition, brain scans show similar neural circuitry to schizophrenia, although not as pronounced or severe. And some people with obsessive compulsive symptoms do go on to develop full schizophrenia (and the medical literature shows the same biochemical imbalances can cause everything from anxiety disorders, to depression, to intrusive thoughts, to schizophrenia), but it’s not everyone, so having intrusive thoughts doesn’t automatically mean you’ll go on to develop hallucinations or delusions as are seen in schizophrenia syndrome. But in some people it does happen, so it’s important to be aware of the risk, and to take action to manage symptoms in the early stages.

But people with this condition of intrusive thoughts have dialed down frontal lobes – the part of the brain where judgment and reason take place – and the emotional centers of the brain are highly activated. This causes them to be in a dreamlike state where images and thoughts pop up involuntarily into their consciousness out of their control, and since the frontal lobe is dialed down, they do not have moral judgment and the thoughts are not being screened for their moral content. They also don’t have the ability to be logical, so the thoughts that pop up will be nonsensical, violent, or sexual thoughts, as well as some benign, morally neutral thoughts – content without moral discretion and without a filter – the intrusive thoughts are not processed by the frontal lobe and thus are not evaluated based on morals. They just flow in and out involuntarily. The person will often not respond to the morally neutral thoughts and fail to really notice them, and it’s just the immoral ones that get their attention because they find them disturbing.

There is an interconnected part of the brain called the Default Mode Network (DMN). The DMN is active when a person is daydreaming and not in a fully alert state. In normal people without mental conditions, the DMN shuts off when they get engaged in active tasks, such as writing a paper, planning, talking actively with friends, etc. But in people with obsessive compulsive syndrome the DMN does not shut off when engaged in active tasks. There’s still much “clutter” and involuntary “talk” from the DMN going on at the same time.

A person with this condition may have the DMN insert say an image of a man raping a woman into their brain – the person then responds in alarm with “That was sickening; how could I have thought that?!” The intrusive image of the man raping the woman was the unconscious thought, and the alarmed and disgusted response was the conscious part of the brain – the frontal lobe. Or the DMN may wander around and settle on the thought “I’m going to sell my soul to the devil soon”, and then the person in alarm prays “Lord, I can’t believe I thought of doing that, please forgive me.”

They have the DMN and the conscious parts of the brain going on at the same time, but they can’t see the stark difference in nature from the involuntary thought that is just a brain glitch and random signal, and their consciously chosen thought.

The medical literature also shows a link between distressing intrusive thoughts and brain inflammation. Histamine is a neurotransmitter and immune modulatory involved in pain. If it’s high you feel pain more keenly. It’s also involved in the fight-or-flight distress signaling of the body. If it’s too high the body will feel like it’s in a state of fight or flight. It’s also involved in wakefulness and contributes to insomnia. It also plays a role in paranoia and in anger. When we get angry with someone, and shout at them, or harbor thoughts of anger, there is a histamine dump that takes place in our brain.

If histamine is chronically too high in the brain thoughts will turn dark in nature, violent, in keeping with the fight or flight response, paranoid, and things of the like. While a Christian can control their conscious thoughts, even when in a state of chronic brain inflammation, and choose not to yell angrily at someone or throw something just because they feel pain and stress in their head and emotions, the unconscious thoughts that take place in the Default Mode Network are not under their control, and these thoughts will change due to the excess histamine and become darker in nature and more violent. The same way that a person with high histamine will have nightmares in their sleep that can be very violent or scary, the person with obsessive compulsive syndrome will have violent involuntary day-time “dreaming” coming from the DMN.

Likewise, high dopamine has been linked in the medical literature with an increase in sexualized thoughts. Once again, the Christian will be able to control their conscious sexual thoughts (though not perfectly as we’re still sinners this side of heaven; through Christ they can do a very good job of this), however they will find themselves unable to control the involuntary roaming of the DMN which will settle on very sexualized thinking if dopamine is too high.

Add violent thoughts and sexual thoughts together without the frontal lobe to do moral judgment and sifting, and you can end up with some pretty distressing and disturbing “clutter” thoughts from the DMN, that are in no way the fault of the adolescent suffering from them.

A pastor or mentor can help the young person reality-check, by asking them a series of questions and pointing out the reality that the young person can’t see – the deficit in their self-referential processing.

For instance, you can ask them…”Ok tell me the next time you think one of these thoughts.” And the young person may go to tell them, but find that they have already thought the thought before they can even say “I’m thinking one of those thoughts again”. You could then point out that the quick speed of the thought reveals it’s not a consciously chosen thought. If one is experiencing a temptation to think a violent thought, there’s always a period of Satan tempting you with it before you give in. The thought kind of knocks on the door of your heart and asks to be let in and chosen and cherished; it doesn’t barge in without your consent.

This is how temptation works according to the Bible. We have a chance to resist the devil, and he will flee from us if we resist him.

But with involuntary thoughts they do barge in without consent. And you could point out the difference. You can also educate them about the Default Mode Network and how the thoughts that come from there don’t involve the desires and the will. They don’t involve higher thinking where moral judgment takes place. They are just random impulses dictated by mood and neurotransmitters, not by moral judgment.

Help the young person to change the terminology to be more accurate. Have them start calling the thoughts, “brain glitches” or something similar.

Take them through situations in their life where God has helped them control their conscious thoughts, say for instance they were tempted to be jealous of their brother because he got a new bicycle and they didn’t get one, or he’s doing better in school than they are. Take them through how they were tempted to be jealous, but then they surrendered to God and resisted the temptation to be jealous, choosing to be grateful for the things God had done in their life instead, knowing He loves them personally and gave His own life for them. They chose to be happy for their brother’s school success, and to ask God to help them do their best, not out of a desire to outperform their brother, but just out of a desire to give things their all out of a desire to please God.

Take them through how God did help them, and took their jealousy away, and gave them new desires. Remind them of how the process of taking every thought captive, and surrendering sinful motives and desires works according to the Bible. Take them through this process step-by-step.

Help them see that when it comes to conscious thoughts, God always gives us the victory. But He doesn’t always stop “brain glitches” aka intrusive thoughts because these are a health condition, and there’s no promise in the Bible that God won’t allow a person to suffer from a health condition.

Explain how the Bible doctrine is different for overcoming sin and for recovering from a health condition. Jesus’ perfect life and death in this world – and the fact that He is God – gave Himself the authority to forgive all sin, and to provide Christians with moral power to overcome sin and to live holy, self-controlled lives. They won’t be perfect of course, until the sanctification process is complete, but they will exhibit real self-control and genuine godliness that will be distinctly different from people of the world who do not believe in and follow God. Victory and fruits of obedience are promised and guaranteed to the Christian.

But good mental and physical health is not a guarantee. God may permit mental conditions to bear sway in your life. There’s many different reasons why He may do this. One big reason is often to test our faith, another is to teach us to have a deeper reliance on God, and not on self. When you have faulty mental processing and cognitive distortions, it really hits directly at pride and self-sufficiency. You learn you can ve wrong – very wrong – about things. That your mind is finite, fallible, and human. That you need a God who is infinite, infallible, and divine to steer the course of your life and make the decisions reserved for God alone.

One of the big benefits I’ve seen in my own mental health journey has been gaining knowledge. If I had not had distressing obsessions and compulsions I wouldn’t have done thorough research into the condition, wouldn’t understand the brain at the level I do now, which is a huge blessing as we are made in the image of God so studying the brain allows us to see the handiwork of God in His most important creation, I wouldn’t have helpful information to share with others who suffer from the condition. It’s hard to be committed to a deep and thorough of something that isn’t personal. It’s when it’s personal that you hunger and thirst for the answers, and God promises that those who seek shall find, and those who ask moral questions and hunger and thirst after righteousness shall not only have their questions answers, but they shall be filled with His righteousness.

I have certainly found the answers in the Bible and in neuroscience involving the important questions intrusive thoughts raise, to be answered in a very satisfying way, showing God to be just and good, even when we lack important brain perceptions and really do think we are guilty, God will never hold someone guilty for something they didn’t do and that is an illness. He always does right by us, always, even when we can’t understand what is going on and are limited due to our finite human nature and the symptoms of an illness that distorts our perception.

God and His truth is not limited by our malfunction. Truth exists outside of us and beyond us, and is eternal. Truth is not under threat when we’re experiencing delusions or lacking important perceptions. Jesus defended truth by His perfect life and death in this world, defeating lies, and lawlessness and evil. Truth and goodness are held up by the very arms of God Himself, the very life of God Almighty. So even when our perception distorts the picture and we fear terrifying things like that we have committed the unpardonable sin, God is outside of our opinions, perception, and self, and His truth is indestructible, always perfect and right. This is one of the important lessons that going through mental conditions like obsessive-compulsive syndrome and psychosis have taught me.

There is a requirement for Christians to take the best care of their health that they possibly can, out of appreciation for Christ who bought them back with His own life.

It’s important to help the sufferer improve their health in any way they can, such as eating a healthier diet, starting supplements that have been proven to help with lowering histamine and thus lowering intrusive thoughts, and if they have the funds for it, encourage them to see a Functional Medicine doctor and be tested and treated for their condition, or try medication if absolutely needed with a mainstream doctor.

They will gain a sense of responsibility and of agency in learning it’s their job to take care of their health, both of which are healing and tend to balance the mind. People need purpose. They need to know God created them for a deeply significant purpose and that learning to care for their body is a core part of that purpose we have as Christians in living for the glory of God.

When they see the supplements and treatments helping, they will start to feel a sense of agency, and relief, knowing they have tools that can tip their thoughts in healthy directions and take control of the turbulent intrusive thoughts and mental clutter and mood swings (if present) going on in their brain. They have weapons to help them win the brain inflammation battle and tip things in their favor.

And of course, it’s crucial you go over what sin is from the Bible. The mental condition has caused imbalanced thinking and cognitive distortions, and so they may have lost basic Bible knowledge such as how the Bible defines sin and what it is. The Bible doesn’t call everything sin. For instance, to be blunt for the sake of clarity in this important issue, when a man has a wet dream, this is not considered sin. There are some sexual things that happen that aren’t sin. Biologically driven sexual desire can be very strong and yet is not sinful. It’s only lust that is sin. Urges aren’t sin. Involuntary sexual responses aren’t sin. And involuntary thoughts aren’t sin either.

And so people who are sexual beings and have sexual expressions that aren’t chosen such as a wet dream, or a sexual urge, when these people become mentally ill, one of the ways their body and brain malfunctions is sexually.

The sexual urges and rumination done by the unconscious part of the brain, that is just part of being a sexual being, and isn’t lust, isn’t chosen fantasizing, comes to the forefront when inflammation is present, and the frontal lobe shuts off. As explained earlier, the person is in almost a dream-like state, with lower passions and impulses dominating, and higher thoughts are dialed down and inactive.

This isn’t sin. It’s a malfunction of the sexual system. Our brain and neuro-hormones are involved in our sexuality. And these can malfunction and go haywire.

Thus the Christian with this condition, who desires to obey God and live a pure life, will find they have much control over their conscious thoughts. They won’t engage in much sexual fantasy when it comes to chosen thoughts. They won’t dehumanize people and see them as sex objects. They will treat people with dignity and value them. They will have concern and care in their motives and expression when they talk with people, their experience in having a mental illness often increases compassion and love in them. But when it comes to unconscious thoughts and impulses, these may be very out-of-control with lots of intrusive sexual or violent thoughts. Because they have a mental condition.

Biblical Philosophy of Sin

What we really need is the correct Biblical philosophy of sin. It’s important that we get this right and clear up any misconceptions that we might have that aren’t Biblical.

What is sin according to the Bible?

Sin is how the fall happened, it’s the moral evil that entered the cosmos and brought natural evil such as cancer and disease. It’s why Christ had to come and die to redeem us – it’s the crux of everything, or rather God’s law is, and breaking His law is the cause of disorder and destruction. What is it?

Sin is anything that goes against God’s perfectly loving character/nature. The Bible tells us “God is love” John 4:8, then it says “The commandments, do not commit adultery, do not murder, do not steal, do not covet and any other commandment, are summed up in this one decree: “Love your neighbor as yourself.” Love does no wrong to its neighbor. Therefore love is the fulfillment of the law.” Romans 13:9-10

God is love and his law is love. Sin is the transgression of the law (1 John 3:4); love is the fulfillment of the law. Sin then is the opposite of love.

Anything that is not Christlike, not loving, not moral and good, is sin.

The 10 commandments contain the inherent rights of God and man. God, being the true God, the Creator who brought all things into being, and who died for man to redeem him to Himself, has a right to our worship for being the Creator, for being a perfect Standard; for having a character of perfect self-sacrificial love for His children. To worship any other God denies God the love and worship that is his by right.

People have a right to being treated with dignity because they are beings made in God’s image. It would be wrong to treat a person the way you would treat a dog; it would deny a person their inherent right to dignity. People have a right to sow and to reap what they sow. To engage in work and reap the results of that work, whether it be monetary or otherwise – and not have their work stolen from them by someone who did not do the work and who has no right to the results of their labor. To steal from them is inherently immoral as it denies the rights of an individual.

People have to life – to not be murdered. This is one of the most basic rights. Not only does a murderer violate a person’s right to life when they kill them, but it steals from God who is the Giver of all Life and the Creator of that person.

Fornication is wrong because it takes from someone privileges reserved for marriage without fulfilling the responsibilities of being that person’s husband or wife. It merges two people into one flesh in a union that is designed for marriage alone. It is not merely a physical act but a spiritual union is created when two people have sex.

So you can see how the breaking of the 1st, 8th, 6th, and 7th commandments is a violation of inherent rights of God and man. And the other commandments similarly are inherent rights of God and man, but I won’t go into all of them here.

What this means is that right and wrong exist as principles inherent within the very fabric of moral reality, coming from the character of God Himself. There is objective right and there is objective wrong. They are not subjective ideas and preferences in the minds of individual people – they exist outside of us.

Jesus explains that the 10 commandments are really 10 categories that encompass far more than just the literal breaking of the written law. For instance, hate is murder, and lust is adultery. (Matthew 5:21-22, 27-28)

The moral law – the 10 commandments – involves all of our thoughts, motives, desires, choices, and actions. This law judges and evaluates every thought and desire, and God categorizes each as either holy or unholy, moral or immoral, good or evil.

Let’s say we make plans to buy our mom a card for mother’s day. That’s a good and right desire that keeps the 5th commandment about the importance of honoring our parents.

Or let’s say we think a mean thought about a school bully and want them to get a bad grade on a test. That’s a thought that breaks the 6th commandment about hate and murder.

So this moral law is very relevant to our lives. By it we have a knowledge of sin (Romans 3:20), and can know when a thought or desire or action is one that God approves of, and is right for a Christian to have, or whether it’s immoral and wrong for a Christian to have.

The Bible says the Word of God, which contains His 10 Commandment law, is – through the power of the Holy Spirit – “alive and active. Sharper than any double-edged sword, it penetrates even to dividing soul and spirit, joints and marrow; it judges the thoughts and attitudes of the heart.”
Hebrews 4:12

Thus we can use the Word of God to know right from wrong, and depending on God for help, His Spirit whose role it is to teach us all the Words of Christ, will teach us when a thought or attitude, or desire is a moral one or an immoral one.

God has given us a conscience, through the Holy Spirit convicting our hearts.

“They show that the requirements of the law are written on their hearts, their consciences also bearing witness, and their thoughts sometimes accusing them and at other times even defending them.)”
Romans 2:15

Because we have this conscience made possible by God’s Spirit interacting with our mind and consciousness, we can judge our thoughts and motives and actions to know if they are moral or immoral. We have a compass.

However our conscience isn’t always perfect. If we have incomplete knowledge of right and wrong, our conscience will reflect our knowledge and understanding. It’s possible for a more mature Christian to have a better grasp of right and wrong than a baby Christian, for instance, and learning and growing in the Word of God is crucial for the Christian. And while our conscience is subject to error because we are fallible human beings who do not always have a perfect knowledge of God’s Word (and some people do not have access to the Bible), and only God’s judgment is infallible and perfect (1 Corinthians 4:4), God does give us guidance and knowledge to live a godly life in this world. To follow Him and obey Him and to be a faithful Christian. He gives us enough knowledge of moral truth to do that.

With the knowledge He gives us from His Word and the help of His Spirit teaching us His Word and giving us a conscience that aligns with His law…we can then surrender wrong attitudes, desires, thoughts to God, and repent of wrong actions and choices, and our High Priest will forgive us and change those immoral things about us.

However, for a person to be said to be sinning, there are a couple other dimensions to this that the Bible specifies.

In Romans 14, Paul speaks of how we should not eat or drink something that could cause a brother to stumble. This can be something that is ok and not a violation of a commandment, but because it would cause confusion and doubt to the new believer and your brother in Christ, it becomes wrong to engage in it around that person. He explains that whatever we do that is not of faith is sin.

21 It is good neither to eat flesh, nor to drink wine, nor any thing whereby thy brother stumbleth, or is offended, or is made weak.

22 Hast thou faith? have it to thyself before God. Happy is he that condemneth not himself in that thing which he alloweth.

23 And he that doubteth is damned if he eat, because he eateth not of faith: for whatsoever is not of faith is sin.

What does this mean that whatsoever is not of faith is sin? Even though objective right and wrong exists and everything is either right or wrong (there are a lot of things that are right so we have a lot of moral options as we engage in life in this world), as human beings we don’t always have perfect knowledge of the scriptures or of right and wrong, and we may not completely understand what is right or wrong. This doesn’t mean it doesn’t exist, only that we understand it imperfectly. We may for instance disagree with a brother about what is right and wrong. This scripture tells us that if there is any doubt that an action is wrong, doing it would be a sin. It’s also a sin to do something completely innocent around a brother who himself has doubts as this could cause him to engage in it before he has adequate Bible knowledge on the subject and could cause him to be tempted to go against his conscience and do something he has doubts about.

This adds another dimension to sin. It’s not merely the actions that are sinful, but also if one in their limited human knowledge isn’t sure but suspects something is sinful, then they sin by engaging in it. Tempting or encouraging someone to engage in something they have doubts about is also sin. We are each stewards of ourselves under God and we have a one-on-one relationship with Him, and an individual conscience. Therefore no person should ever assume the role of conscience for another person. To do this is to make oneself a god and to violate the human rights of another person, treating them as less than human.

It’s also true that if someone does not have enough knowledge to know something is sinful, or they are lied to, that it’s not a sin for someone to do something they really don’t think is a sin.

Mothers for instance from other time periods were told by doctors of their day that medical practices were safe that we now know to be very unsafe, such as taking mercury for colds and flues. These mothers weren’t sinning who gave their children these treatments because they didn’t know they were harmful and thought they were giving their children the best that medicine had to offer.

Now, for a mother to know mercury is a poison and hire a physician to give it to her child – would be a sin, because she knows it’s harmful and she’s giving it anyway.

It would also be a sin for a mother to worship the doctor and blindly do whatever he suggests, without doing her own research and praying to God for wisdom. Her child has been entrusted to her by God and she’s responsible for its well-being, not the doctor. Doctors are helpers not dictators. Therefore she goes against her responsibility of stewardship if she blindly listens to a doctor and obeys him like a robot.

There have doubtless then been many cases through history of people not sinning and yet causing harm without realizing it. Human knowledge is limited and we’re not omniscient. It’s also possible to do an inherently good thing with a selfish motive and sin. Giving money to help the poor so that people will praise you and like you, for instance, rather than doing it to actually alleviate suffering and caring about the sufferers. Paul talks about this when he says “if I give my body to be burned but have not love, what does it profit me?” showing that one can do inherently good acts from a selfish motive and it’s therefore not love.

So to not be sinning it’s not enough that we do inherently good things. Knowledge is also part of this, and motive is as well.

James 4:17 speaks again about this other dimension: “He who knows the good he ought to do and does it not, to him it is sin.”

The person must have knowledge, or they aren’t sinning. They also must have the ability to know and to reason, so someone who has lost the ability to reason due to a stroke or due to severe mental illness cannot choose to sin.

Jesus speaks about this concept:

“If you were blind,” Jesus replied, “you would not be guilty of sin. But since you claim you can see, your guilt remains.”
John 9:41

One must be able to “see” to do the right thing, in order for it to be a sin for them to fail to do the right thing.

Notice also in James 4:17 that the person must be able to choose to do or not to do, in order to sin.

There is not an instance in scripture where someone is declared guilty by God for something they didn’t do.

Fornication for instance is a sin, and rape is a sin, but being raped is not a sin. In the case of being raped fornication is happening and it is very sexual and it can certainly feel “wrong”, but the victim is innocent. It is only the rapist who is guilty.

25 But if a man find a betrothed damsel in the field, and the man force her, and lie with her: then the man only that lay with her shall die.

26 But unto the damsel thou shalt do nothing; there is in the damsel no sin worthy of death: for as when a man riseth against his neighbour, and slayeth him, even so is this matter:

27 For he found her in the field, and the betrothed damsel cried, and there was none to save her.

Deuteronomy 22

Like murder which is certainly not the fault of the one who is murdered, so rape is not the fault of the one who is raped, and the guilt and sin lies only with the rapist. So you can see how something sexual and even violent and impure doesn’t make it a sin. It’s only if the person does that thing. If that thing is done TO that person against their will, as in the case of rape, the victim is innocent.

The Bible definitely tells us that a person can sin in their thoughts.

Seek the LORD while he may be found; call on him while he is near.
Let the wicked forsake their ways and the unrighteous their thoughts. Let them turn to the LORD, and he will have mercy on them, and to our God, for he will freely pardon.
Isaiah 55:6-7

We can sin even in our attitudes and intents of our heart, our motives.

Repent, therefore, of your wickedness, and pray to the Lord. Perhaps He will forgive you for the intent of your heart.
Acts 8:22

21 Ye have heard that it was said of them of old time, Thou shalt not kill; and whosoever shall kill shall be in danger of the judgment:

22 But I say unto you, That whosoever is angry with his brother without a cause shall be in danger of the judgment: and whosoever shall say to his brother, Raca, shall be in danger of the council: but whosoever shall say, Thou fool, shall be in danger of hell fire.

27 Ye have heard that it was said by them of old time, Thou shalt not commit adultery:

28 But I say unto you, That whosoever looketh on a woman to lust after her hath committed adultery with her already in his heart.

Matthew 5:

Someone who desires to murder another – even if they never act on it – is sinning in the intents of their heart.

Anyone who hates a brother or sister is a murderer, and you know that no murderer has eternal life residing in him.
1 John 3:15

So, it is NOT just our outward actions that we can sin with, but also our attitudes and intents and motives in our heart. Our thoughts.

However, even in our thoughts they must be chosen in order for them to be sin. There is not a place in scripture where someone is pronounced guilty by God for something they did not choose to think or to do.

Explain how we are born with a fallen nature and so we inevitably will sin, yet sin is active.

As in the rape example, the question now becomes “are these thoughts I’m experiencing more like rape, or are they more like fornication?” Are these thoughts happening to me, or am I making them happen?

The truth is from the Bible it’s clear that if you know right from wrong, and you’re still choosing to make these thoughts happen, then it’s a sin. If however, you have lost your ability to tell right from wrong and don’t know these thoughts are immoral then it wouldn’t be a sin for you (as may possibly be the case in some people with brain injury and mental illness), OR if you know they are immoral but you’re not making them happen.

This is the Bible criteria for sin. If you know it’s wrong, and you’re choosing to do it, it’s sin. If you don’t know it’s wrong and don’t suspect it’s wrong and you choose to do it it’s not sin. If you aren’t doing it and it’s something that’s happening to you, then it’s not sin.

“How could these be my own thoughts and yet I’m not the one choosing them” you might ask? Well, it turns out there are a lot of involuntary processes in the human body. And Christians have always drawn a line between involuntary processes and sin. For instance, when pastors counsel young men not to lust after young women, they don’t count physical sexual desire as a sin, even though it can be a very intense feeling, nor do they count erections as sin that happen naturally as a result of the man having a healthy nervous system and hormonal system that works that way. If he brought about the arousal by thinking lustful thoughts, then it’s a sin. If he brought about the arousal by looking at half-naked pictures of women, then it’s a sin. But if it just happened spontaneously due to hormones, it’s not a sin.

Similarly pastors don’t tell someone with a gay attraction that they are sinning by simply being tempted by that desire. It’s only if they think gay thoughts or act on those thoughts that they have sinned. It’s also not a sin to be tempted to be violent or to be jealous. It’s only a sin if you deliberately think a jealous or violent thought.

Sin is always deliberate and chosen, even in cases where it’s a sin of omission (meaning something that you should have done that you neglected), it’s deliberately neglected.

So the next question that follows is: “Are these voluntary or involuntary thoughts I’m having?” and another question that is very relevant “what even is a thought? Do these things flooding my mind even fit the definition of a thought, or are they some other phenomenon?” In order to try to get to the bottom of this I met online with neuroscience tutors and had conversations with a neurologist.

Not everything that our brain does is a thought. Our brain takes in images and interprets them – this wouldn’t be classified as a thought. Our brain makes sure we are walking upright and keeps track of our position – this isn’t a thought. Our brain stores memories – even of sins we’ve done or had done to us – and these aren’t considered thoughts. We wouldn’t consider our brain storing memories of sins we’ve done as our brain sinning. If we couldn’t remember our sins we couldn’t bring them to Christ and ask for strength to help with those specific fallen desires and inclinations. We couldn’t ask Jesus to help us make right the wrongs we’d done to others if we couldn’t remember what we’d done to them that was wrong. We do need to remember those things, but not dwell on them or delight in them of course. And it’s not a sin to have memories. It would be a sin to think in detail about the fornication we committed before our conversion. To actively engage in fantasy of past sins, to enjoy and delight in them, is definitely sin. But to know and recount the details the way a police officer might report a case is not sin. To know the details of what happened and store them in one’s memory, and then to bring them up and confess them to Christ, is certainly not sin.

What about hallucinations – are these thoughts? What about dreams? These are very important questions.

There are lots of involuntary processes in the brain and body – are these blasphemous ideas and images voluntary or involuntary? And are they even thoughts or are they something else?

Severe Mental Illness Involves Loss of Control

There are some conditions where a person has irresistible compulsions, such as during full psychosis, or when there’s been damage from a stroke or dementia. I want to talk briefly about compulsions that involve actions, rather than just compulsions in the thoughts. A compulsion in the thoughts might be something like praying “Lord forgive me” every time you see a violent intrusive image pop into your head.

But a compulsive action could be something like a person in psychosis has a hallucination that their father is an alien, along with strong compulsions to assault the alien to protect their family. They may commit a crime and assault their father in the midst of their delusion and irresistible compulsions.

Severe Mental Illness often involves loss of control and loss of function in various ways. Coming back from being treated for a severe mental illness and regaining function, but still having a loss of some function, I’ve been able to see that I really am a living machine of sorts. I’ve been able to see the perimeters of my finite nature.

God is an infinite being with moral agency.
We are finite beings with moral agency.

God’s brain is an eternal, infinite, indestructible brain, that can never err and is infallible.
Our brain is a created, finite, physical structure, that has limited knowledge, often errs, and due to sin is subject to breaking down and malfunctioning in its structure.

When my symptoms get worse I sometimes lose impulse control or I am bombarded with intrusive images. Then when I take supplements or medication the symptoms come back to a place where I can control my actions and my thoughts again.

We are held accountable for the things within our control, not the things outside of our control. This is always the Biblical rule. Everyone is finite, some have more agency and control than others and others have a lot less. But if we are faithful with what is within our control then we are still Christians in good standing and right relationship with Christ. Those of us with awareness into our condition have an obligation to seek out effective treatments to help us manage symptoms, but even as we do this, not everyone with severe mental illness will have complete control and agency over their impulses at all times. This is why they need to inform family of their condition and be supported in their illness. It’s necessary for the church and the community also to become educated and informed about how to help and provide resources for those with SMI and protection for the community.

The truth is if rest homes were not provided for the elderly we would actually see crimes being committed by older people in dementia. But thankfully we have a good system in place for those who lose control of their impulses due to dementia and the community is kept safe from them while they are cared for. But unfortunately the same services are not always provided for those who are younger who have severe mental illness, and this is why we see more crimes committed by younger people with mental symptoms.

The Question Our Illness Keeps Us From Asking

After writing this chapter I ran this question by someone I know “If you started getting intrusive violent or blasphemous thoughts, as someone with sound reasoning, what would your reaction be?” I wanted to know what a normal reaction would be for someone who doesn’t have a mental illness and who is thinking clearly, if this happened to them. And she responded “I’d be asking what’s wrong with my brain?” She went on to explain that she’d be very worried her brain was damaged and she’d developed a mental condition, and that her next step would be seeing a doctor and asking them what could be wrong with her.

This answer hit me hard. Wow, how unfortunate it is that those of us with these conditions have our reasoning and our awareness hijacked by the illness so that we can’t ask the simple question “what’s wrong with my brain?” and be concerned about our health. The illness traps us in our room for months and months trying to control the violent and blasphemous thoughts, feeling intense guilt, never addressing the real issue, that hey maybe there’s something wrong with my brain’s hardware – maybe I’m ill – and maybe I need to see a psychiatrist or Functional Medicine doctor and be treated. It is unfortunate that so many times mental illnesses hijack our cognitive function and impair our perception so we can’t see our problems for what they really are and problem solve effectively and get help sooner than we usually do. It often takes an intervention on the part of family to get the person to a doctor.